It hit me today that today was my last "first" day as a drum major. Sure, I've known that this is my last year but it really sunk it today that I will never be in this position again. Along the same lines I will never again be at my university as an undergrad student. This is my last chance to live the "college" life.
However, I am also living the "married" life. The combination of the two makes for an interesting struggle. There are times when I wonder if any of my friends even remotely understand the issues I face, it seems like they live this disillusioned life of how things are going to be in the "real" world. There are budgets, and no more asking Daddy for money, sometimes washers break and that $75 you were saving up for a long weekend is now invested in the man that is letting his butt crack hang out in your kitchen. Things are different than I thought they would be, but the best part of all of this change and uncertainty is that, no matter how cranky I am, when I break down in the kitchen floor over soapy water and unwashed dishes I have a pair of arms that are right there to pick me up again. And that, my friends, is worth all the broken washers in the world. So, this first/last year is going to be a great one because I have someone that reminds me that I am worth something to at least one person in this world and that makes all the difference.
Love,
a s h l e y
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